Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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