There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize