My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
