After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
