I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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