Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
