There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
