Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Randomize
