Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
