I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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