haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Are these your boobs on my camera?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
