I wish I could punch you in the face.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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