The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
