I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
