Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
