this just has baby written all over it
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
