Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
