she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I think a kid would responsible me up
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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