it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
