margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
