I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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