The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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