I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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