More tranny stories later!
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize