Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize