I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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