Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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