I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
it glows. i had to have it.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Randomize
