My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
