You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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