thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
