Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
