she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
