I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Randomize
