And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
