he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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