So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize