I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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