So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
