They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
