Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
