i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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