The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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