I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize