what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
