you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
im holly from the hills drunk
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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