There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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