u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
