Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize