i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
