so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Sorry about my life...
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
