He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
